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Pro-Ana Nation

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Embaressed [11 May 2008|12:39pm]

So I have not posted here in a long time because I moved in with my boyfriend and have been really happy and eating well. I have been feeling like shit about myself lately because I know I have gained weight, and even though my boyfriend says I look beautiful and loves me I know I am gross. It all hit me when I saw a picture of myself and someone had commented that I look pregnant. I think I could just die of embarassment. I can not believe I let myself get so fat and comfortable.
Know I dont even know where to start. The begining is such a slow process it is frusterating. It is also really hard not to eat because my boyfriend is always here for dinner and on the weekends....I can not eat during the day at work, but when I get home I need to think of some ways to avoid him force feeding me. Like this morning he made pancackes and sausages, I said I would have one pancack which I only had a few bits of then he forced me to eat a sausage. SICK.
Any advice....what to eat during the day so I have a little energy and how to avaoid being force feed at night?
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[24 Mar 2008|07:19pm]

hope everyone has a good day
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woah [11 May 2007|11:37am]

it's been a while since i've been here.
like, a really long time.
i got hospitalised and now i'm back and so ready to get back into it.
i wasn't even skinny. and now i'm fucking fat as.
can't wait.
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[13 Mar 2007|10:12pm]

just wanted to see if this community was still active. Been almost a year since I've been on here.
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[21 Feb 2007|12:42pm]

does anyone else compare themselves to the size and shape of other girls?? i do. last night i was asking my bf if i was skinnier then one of my house mates and he said we looked around the same. now don't get me wrong she isn't fat or anything, but she eats what she wants when she wants, she never exercises and drinks alcohol all the time. i got a bit upset with the fact i cant eat anything without thinking of how many calories im consuming!!am i sad to be mad?on the plus side my bf did say i had a flatter stomach then her!!
in other news just been to the gym, feel a bit faint so going to have a salad for lunch. tonight cooking pasta with a healthy tomato sauce. went to yoga and pilates yday!! last night my bf had a big bag or crisps and a bar of chocolate and kept offering me some!! and i actually managed to RESIST!!lol couldn't believe it (& neither could my bf!!)
feeling good about myself hope i can keep it up and not cave in!!
sorry for the long post!!
think thin
xx kg xx
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[19 Feb 2007|01:27pm]

so today is the start of my detox! i have even got my bf doing it with me.(makes evening meals a lot easier) so far i haven't eaten anything but im going to eat an apple. I have been to the gym did 60 mins cardio half hour weights, and i have just been to a yoga class. just eating fruit all day till tonight. then tonight just going to have a small stirfry with brown rice. Don't think it should be that many calories. feel very determined to keep this up. just hope it stays that way!!!wish me luck
think thin
xx kg xx
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[18 Feb 2007|08:18am]

its my 600 cal day of 2468! been up since half four. think me and my little sister are going to go running (well i am going to attempt as im soo bad at running!!) and then i start my detox tmro with my bf so excited about it!!
how is everyone else, hope your all ok
think thin lovlies
xx kg xx
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[15 Feb 2007|12:19pm]

hey everyone! i hope you all had a good valentine's day!nothing i am doing is making me lose weight! im still stuck at 113!! its driving me mad i feel like a complete failure. if any one has any ideas on how to kick start the weight loss it would be greatly appreciated. Im trying to eat no more then 700 calories a day. so far i haven't eaten any. I just feel so ugly and fat and im sure that the way everyone looks at me!
think thin girlys
xx kg xx
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[09 Feb 2007|01:08pm]

it has been too long since i posted here...how is every1!?does any one still post here! lately i have been feeling weak ( as in eat when i shouldnt be) im currently around 113 which is what i was when i last posted! what a loser... i haven't even lost anything. i feel very low...i need to lose some weight. but i have started exercising more and fiting it into my schedue. just gotta keep it up and i will...i am going on hols with my bf soon so i gotta look good in my bikini. at tho mo i look like a hippo!
hope every1 is doing better then me!
miss you all
xx kg xx
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The only guy in the world? [04 Feb 2007|05:31pm]

[ mood | hungry ]


Are there any other male anorexics out there?

That was just to randomly begin the conversation.

I am 17. Male. Gay. Living near York, in the UK.

I am 5"6 and weight 108 lbs.

I want to be 98 lbs.

On thursday i was 112 lbs.

Since then i have eaten very little. But at least something at every emal time. Even if its like half a bowl of pasta...

So 4 pounds over a weekend is good.

I haven;t eaten today yet.

And i went on a 6 mile run/walk.

It was fun.

So hopefully by next monday i will be even less.

Although i caved last night and ate abotu 1400 cals worth of chocolate. After being soooo good as well!

I coudln;t sleep thinking about the chocolate i ate...

So. I am craving food now. About to have a small bowl of pasta and 220 cal chicken kiev.

After that i KNOW i will want some chocolate or some chocolate spread on bread.

Think THIN everyone!

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wow people! [02 Feb 2007|11:58am]

[ mood | cold ]

i completely forgot about this community, i'll be accepting member requests now.
LOL as if anyone will post here, but feel free to now =)

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[17 Dec 2006|06:28am]

[ mood | calm ]

ahhhh I havent posted here in forever...
5'4 ( and a quarter)
91 Ibs
20 yrs old

Past is not important..

future undetermined

so will see how it goes..!!


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[13 Nov 2006|08:33pm]

long time no post!!
so im 113 now, ive started taking these diet pills called slimb bomb has any1 tried them and do they work? they seem to make me hungrier and i havent lost any weight on them!!
me and my little sister are on strict eating orders up untill xmas, i want to be at least 105 by then!!so i need to lose at least 8 pounds by then!!
i have started doing exercise everyday.....
hope every1 else is ok
xx kg xx
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[07 Nov 2006|06:12pm]

so its happened......my parents came up on sunday along with my sister and told me they were worried that im "not listening to my body" b/c of the whole hospital thing last week. my dad asked how much i weighed at the end of last year and when i went back to school in august and now and i kinda fudged the numbers a little bit....but o well....and he told me if i didnt gain weight and get healthy they were going to take me out of school and bring me home. im NOT going home. but im also NOT gaining weight. he brought me to super walmart and bought me all these protein bars and granola bars and crackers and peanut butter and string cheese and stuff like that. i have to call my mom every night and email my dad and tell him what i had to eat that day which i think is completely unreasonable.

ive been eating more in front of people so if my parents ask, people can say im eating more....its really annoying and i hate doing this but i can't gain weight and i can't go home either. i hate being at home with my parents especially now that theyre watching everything i put into my mouth from 150 miles away

ok well other than that my week is sooo stressful....with practices in the mornings four days this week [at 5:30am], i have tv tapings wed and thurs nights, and fri afternoon, and i register for classes on friday and leave for philadelphia for my regatta [thats a race for rowing].........i hope everyone else is doing better than me :(

keep thinking thin
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[06 Nov 2006|01:42pm]

Okay ... I started posting on here and its gone quiet again.

Something I said?? I hope not. I want to be friends.

If anyones interest I posted some poems in my journal. I wrote them myself, and just thought I would be brave to share. You dont have to comment, but if you do read them, thank you.

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[03 Nov 2006|09:30am]

Hey everyone, thank god its Friday. Freezing Friday. I really cant stand winter, especially when I am out of the house. I feel so cold I ache to the bone!

Im not eating today, not until my dinner tonight, I am determined not to. For breakfast at work, its toast, and everyone will be tucking into it soon .. urgh, I just cant! Said I was sick after the toast last week and that I dont want any today. They were happy with that!

Hope everyone is doing okay ... be happy, and stay strong.

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[02 Nov 2006|01:35pm]

Hey everyone, ive not posted to this community for ages and ages!! It really went quiet for a while. I hope you are all okay and doing well. Ive had a not so good few months, what with maintaining my weight, and all the problems with the laxatives, but I keep hanging in there, and at the moment am trying to get a plan going where I am loosing again. Its soo hard though.

For the past two days I have been eating normally, but am suffering for it today, not just with the disgust at having more food than I normally would, I have just got the worse stomach ache you can imagine. Bloated and crampy .. I feel so fat and ugly its unreal!

Anyway, ill keep checking out this community, it was so supportive of me before, and would be great if it kept going.

Stay strong girlies ... mwah !!
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[30 Oct 2006|04:48pm]

so im back in the dorm now, they said i didnt have a seizure problem which is good

after i told the nurse i would eat the corn flakes [they werent real corn flakes like the brand...they were like fake flakes i guess haha] i opened them in front of her and when she left i ended up eating them throughout the night b/c i was watching a movie and i cant watch a movie on my computer without eating something i hate it :( but i checked the label and it only had 70 cals!!! so thats all i ate all day.....soooo proud of myself.

today im starting a detox of just water and fruits and veggies.....but i might end up postponing it until tomorrow b/c me and my friends are taking our friend out to dinner b/c her bday was yesterday and we didnt go yesterday b/c i was in the hospital and all that stuff. i feel bad saying i cant go b/c they postponed it just for me....but im just going to have a salad and MAYBE a small small small entree.....like an appetizer sized something idk where we're going yet and that makes me nervous....i want to plan exactly what im going to eat before we go!!!!!

ok im going....have to go to class....no break for me :/

think thin ladies...youre my strength and motivation!!!!!
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[30 Oct 2006|02:59am]

so i'm in the hospital :(
it doesnt have to do with ana but im worried they'll notice i didnt touch the breakfast or lunch trays.

so anyway... I got alcohol poisoning last night. I passed out midsentence in a fight with my bf and started shaking on the ground. He thought i had been roofied and brought me to the hospital and they think i have a seizure problem and gave me a CT scan. My BAC was .192 which is def not good.

my bf knows its bc i didnt eat yesterday. he told me i need to eat more and if i lose any more weight he'll break up with me b.c im already too tiny. however im not. im a cow im dusgusting and refuse to back down to his demands. he knows im ana but doesnt know that i know he knows. this is so hard. i know he keeps trying to make me eat and thats why im happy hes not coming to visit me until later when they take the trays away and i can tell him i ate. but i did luck out with the nurse...she was like 'you're not hungry?' and i told her i dont eat pork [which is true] and thats the only thing they had for lunch and she said if i was hungry she'd make me a sandwich but then i told her id just eat the corn flakes from the breakfast tray. and i think shes off duty now so i dont have to worry about that.

ugh long post sorry but im sooo bored!!!!!! im supposed to go home in the morning after they do an EEG so hopefully im ok!! i'll let you know tomorrow how everything went!!!

think thin ladies!!!!!!
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[27 Oct 2006|09:40am]

morning everyone!!
went to 2 exercise classes last night so im aching but going to the gym today!! feel so much more of energy now i have started exercising more. deffo have to keep it up!! and i like that my body aches a little bit, shows im doing something!! hope your all ok
xx kg xx
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